How To Act When A Woman Likes You
Post Some Comments or Sucessful Stories please


***QUESTION FROM A READER***

Dave,

I've become a very generous guy lately. To all my
male friends, I'm giving them the gift of your newsletter.
To all my females, I'm giving the gift of missing
me.

I'm a recovering wuss. I took a few months off of
women and worked on my inner game, with great results.
I've started talking to new women again, along with
old girlfriends. I find that when the c/f (Cocky &
Funny) starts rolling, or even just my newfound confidence,
I often get a lot of compliments. What's the best
way to deal with a girl coming out and saying "oh,
you're so cute/funny/etc..."? Should I ignore it and
keep the c/f going? Should I address it in a cocky
way? I'm assuming that graciously accepting the compliment
is never the right answer...

What would you say to a girl who compliments you directly?
(other than "Do you do third input?") What would your
tone/body language/eye contact be like?

-J.M.
>From new hampshire, where men are men, women are few,
and sheep are nervous.


>>>MY COMMENTS:

You know, this really is a great question.

One of the most important things to understand as
a man is what to do when things are WORKING... so
you don't SCREW IT UP!

If you use the materials that you're learning from
me, you will start to have a magical thing happen
more and more often... women will start to do and
say things that clearly indicate that they LIKE you.

Sometimes is will be a touch, sometimes a compliment,
and sometimes a smile. But these things WILL happen
more and more as you get better and better.

I always laugh to myself when I bust a woman's chops
really hard, and she laughs and says "You're so funny!"
or "You really are good!" etc.

I still shake my head and wonder why the hell it took
me so long to figure this stuff out.

But I digress... you know, while I'm digressing, what's
with you ending your email with:

">From new hampshire, where men are men, women are
few, and sheep are nervous."

...?!

This is probably the third or fourth time that I've
seen this at the end of an email.

Tell me the truth... do chicks dig this?

You're making me nervous, man. Keep the sheep talk
on the DL, OK?

Uncool.

Now, when a woman does something that signals "I like
you", it is VITALLY important that you:

1) Know how to recognize it

2) DON'T do what MOST guy do

3) DO the right thing, and AMPLIFY it


So how can you tell if a woman is doing something
that says "I like you"?

Well, it's VERY important to remember that women are
far more "subtle" than men (most of the time, that
is).

If a man is interested in a woman, you can see it
all over his face. It's usually very obvious.

But women are different.

Women do SMALL things.

A little touch. A sly smile. Sometimes a comment like
"You're so cute" (as in your example above).

But then IT'S GONE.

Women always seem to act like they're not quite sure.

They don't send consistent signals that most men can
"read".

And when they DO send signals that are easy to see,
most guys respond in a way that makes those signals
stop...which makes things even MORE confusing.

Again, women aren't as CONSISTENT as men.

A woman can seem like she's interested one minute,
then stand-offish the next.

So rule #1 is:

JUST BECAUSE SHE'S DOING SOMETHING THAT SAYS "I LIKE
YOU", DON'T THINK THAT IT MEANS "I LIKE YOU NO MATTER
WHAT".

Much better to interpret subtle "I like you" cues
as "I like you for a second, but if you start acting
like a Wuss Bag or Dumb Ass, it will all be over in
an instant".

Unfortunately for most guys, they take "I like you"
signals to mean "You've won my approval, now you
can do whatever you want".

And what do they do? Of course...

They turn into dorks, say or do a few stupid things,
and destroy it all.

Oh, how many times I've watched guys (myself included)
screw up perfectly good situations because they just
didn't get this concept.

Let me give you an example.

Let's say that you're out with a woman, and you've
been teasing her, and she smiles and says "I like
you".

A typical "male" response is for a guy to think to
himself "OK, I'm in... she digs me" and to get that
rush in the head and chest.

Next thing you know, he's acting different.

He's talking about different things.

He's giving compliments.

He's being "nicer".

And what's the woman thinking while this is all going
on? Of course... she's thinking "Uh oh, his cool,
calm, interesting personality was just a cover for
the secret inner-Wuss that was hiding out, waiting
for a little bit of approval from me... AHHHHHH!"

Women KNOW that they're in control of the situation.
Or at least MOST of the time they are... and they
THINK that they are even during the times when they're
not.

They're constantly using different kinds of communication
to test and "feel out" the situation.

Remember, MOST of the time when you're saying something
that you think is nice, charming, and original, it's
something that a woman has heard about 47 times that
week from other guys.

Us guys act VERY predictably most of the time.

And women know how to tell if you're just another
loser who's pretending to be cool... who will turn
into an average Wuss at the first sign of attraction
from a cute woman.

Think about what I just said.

This is hard for a lot of guys to swallow... but it's
the reality of the situation.

There's something that women call "Sexual Tension".
It's also known as "Chemistry" or "Attraction" as
well. But only WOMEN know it this way.

When you tease a woman, make her laugh, play hard
to get with her, act unpredictably, etc. in the right
way, you will create this tension. This is what usually
leads to a woman saying something like "You're cute"
or "I like you".

It's the TENSION that makes her FEEL it and SAY it.

THE TENSION!

In these very special moments, you need to turn the
tension UP. Dial it up. AMPLIFY it.

Don't diffuse it all by saying "You're cute yourself"
or "I like you, too". Or by smiling like a jackass
wussy dork who has just seen his first rainbow.

This kind of thing RELEASES the tension, and it usually
takes that wonderful electric attraction feeling that
the woman is feeling and INSTANTLY kills it.

Does this make logical sense?

Hell no.

But it's what happens.

OK, so let's talk about the RIGHT way to handle this
type of situation.

Remember when I said that it's the TENSION that makes
a woman feel the feelings and make the comments?

And that you need to AMPLIFY it when you're getting
a positive response?

Nice.

Once upon a time, there was a scene in a movie that
illustrated this concept PERFECTLY.

In fact, it might be the all-time greatest example
of this principle that has ever been recorded on film.

Remember the end of "The Empire Strikes Back" when
they were about to put Han Solo into the deep freeze?

Remember when Leia said "I love you"...?

Remember what Han said?

Right, he said... "I know".

Perfect.

All of the sexual tension that built up in Star Wars
and Empire culminated in Leia confessing her love.

And Han says "I know".

Awesome!

Imagine being Leia. What could be going through her
mind at this point?

An answer like this isn't easy to understand. It has
all kinds of implications.

It's confusing.

It says "I know you love me, because it's been obvious
for a long time...". But it doesn't let HER know how
he feels exactly. It requires consideration. It dials
up the tension. It's amazing.

By the way, I read that when they were filming that
scene Han was supposed to answer "I love you too",
but the director didn't like it. They tried all kinds
of things, and in the end Harrison Ford made up that
line on the spot in one of the takes... and they kept
it. Nice.

By the way, one of the BIG reasons why the newer movies
in the Star Wars series suck is because there is no
character like Han... think about it. It's all boring,
predictable stuff. There's no sexy, arrogant, funny,
wildcard personality messing things up.

Like I pointed out after I saw "Attack Of The Clones",
Anakin had to kill an ENTIRE VILLAGE of Sand People
just to convince Princess A. that he wasn't a complete
and total Wuss. Would have been so much easier and
more entertaining if he would have just had a PERSONALITY.

Whatever.

Now where was I...?

Oh, yea... amplifying the sexual tension...

If you're out with a woman, and you tease her because
she's wearing four inch heels by saying "What's the
deal, are you four feet tall without those one?",
and she opens her mouth with the classic "Oh no you
didn't" look (smiling of course, with that surprised
smile)... and you dial it up to the next level with
"Oh, I'm sorry...Four foot three?"... and she hits
you on the arm...

...and then she stops, puts her hand on your arm,
and says "You know, you're funny"...

...what do you do?

YOU SAY "YEA, I KNOW" - in a serious tone.

Or "Don't try to use compliments to make me like you.
It won't work. Go buy me a drink or something... I
prefer gifts and money."

Or look down at her hand on your arm, lean back slightly,
turn your head, and put your eyebrows together as if
to say "Just WHAT do you think you're doing touching
me?!".

TURN IT UP, my friend!

You TURN UP the tension.

AMPLIFY it.

Keep it going.

If you keep amplifying the tension and attraction
at each of these wonderful moments, good things will
happen.

Good stuff.