Women, Body Language, And Attraction
Post Some Comments or Sucessful Stories Please


***QUESTION FROM A READER***

Hi Dave,

I have had your book for many months... Anyways, I
used to be a super-wuss. Only got unpleasant fat chicks.
Bought your book. Cleaned up my hair, my clothes,
my apartment. Took baby-steps to improve my self-esteem
and eliminate my insecurities. Now, even though I
am not, nor ever will be a GQ model, I walk around
with my head held high and walk slowly as if to say
'hey world, here I am!'. I practiced online and met
this girl who, after spending an afternoon just shooting
pool (the whole time I accused her of cheating) and
throwing snowballs at her (especially after she told
me not to), tried to seduce me. Then I started practicing
on the girls at work. Just little baby-steps. 'Hi'
then 'what's your name', etc. And now I can go out
in public and do that with a complete stranger. And
I do. Almost every day. And I keep a journal of what
I notice.

Anyways, here is my question. Since I can now talk
to a beautiful woman I've never met before like she's
an average joe, I've noticed body language, from the
women, that I never used to see. It signals nervousness
to me. Examples are: looking at the floor instantly
when I say hi, nervous laughter after she tries to
make a lame joke or just some statement, fidgeting,
running her fingers through her hair a lot. It usually
happens after a couple minutes of her meeting me,
even when they don't seem nervous at all at first.
And I don't always bust on them, but sometimes I do.
I just try to stay myself. Upbeat but not emotional.
I give lots of eye contact and have even seen pupils
dilate right in front of me. So I'm confused. Is her
being nervous around me a good thing? Or am I doing
something wrong? I figured since you spent years at
this, you were the man to ask. Even if you don't want
to use my email, your time in addressing this issue
would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

W., Ohio


>>>MY COMMENTS:

Thanks for your email, you've shared some really interesting
points and brought up some issues that I think a lot
of guys can benefit from...

First of all, great job working on all of those little
things that add up to a big improvement.

Most of us will never be GQ models, but we can all
do our best with what we have.

Too many guys take the attitude of "I'll never be
a GQ model, and therefore I shouldn't brush my teeth
or comb my hair either"... which is horrible.

Women are far less concerned with "physical beauty"
than men, but the ARE concerned with how a man takes
care of what he has.

Also, good job practicing online and in the real world.
The more you practice, the better you'll be when the
opportunities present themselves in the real world.

And now, to address your question...

You are JUST STARTING to see things that have been
happening all around you, and now you need to start
understanding what they mean.

When you begin to treat beautiful women like they're
just another person, and you start communicating with
them in a way that says "Hi, I'm a confident, sexually
aware man... and I want to find out what you're like
as a person" it has ALL KINDS of interesting effects.

Some women will get nervous, some will get turned
on.

Some will even run away because they're intimidated.

I'd like you to imagine something for a second.

Imagine that you're an attractive woman who walks
around all day getting approached by men, asked out,
and generally treated like you're special. Imagine
that this is what you've become accustomed to, and
that you have a basic way of responding to all of
these men: You smile politely and say that you have
a boyfriend, and if the man persists you act cold
and walk away.

Now, imagine that all of a sudden a man shows up that
is OBVIOUSLY not "taken off balance" by your looks,
and who seems to be different. In fact, you can't
tell what's going on because he's not acting like
a needy Wuss who wants to treat you special just because
you happen to be physically beautiful.

Further, what if you actually started to feel a GUT
LEVEL ATTRACTION for him while he was talking to you,
and it surprised you.

HOW WOULD YOU ACT?

You'd probably start to get a little nervous, and
feel a little uncomfortable.

Right?

It's natural for humans to feel nervous when they're
in the presence of someone who's making them feel
feelings that they don't often feel.

But just because a person is acting NERVOUS doesn't
mean that they're not ENJOYING it.

Now, with all that said, the only thing that really
matters when you're talking to a beautiful woman
who you're interested in seeing again is the RESULT.

In other words, it doesn't matter how you feel, how
she feels, what is said, etc. in the end.

The only thing that matters after it's all said and
done is whether or not you see her AGAIN.

So here's what I'd do if I were you...

USE THE 3 MINUTE EMAIL/PHONE NUMBER TECHNIQUE
WITH EVERY WOMAN YOU TALK TO!

While you're still learning about subtle female body
language and attraction, you need to get the email
and number to follow up with later. ALWAYS.

The more you do this, and then follow up later, the
more you'll begin to connect RESULTS with how a woman
was acting when you were FIRST talking to her.

Does this make sense?

You'll even start to be able to tell what works and
what doesn't based purely on the EMAIL responses you
get from women you've met.

You're on the right track, and you're figuring out
things that most men won't even KNOW EXIST in their
entire lives... so stick with it.